I never thought I had an issue with idolatry. I mean, seriously, the word itself brings up images of men in long robes bowing down to golden calves. The closest I come to that is driving by a Chick-Fil-A billboard and following its arrow to the nearest restaurant.
But recently, God showed me that I do, indeed, have idolatry issues. But it’s not golden calves I’m worshipping. It’s my kids.
I am fairly easy-going, but I can turn “Mama Bear” with the best of them. And I know 
God gave us moms these maternal instincts because that is part of our role – to protect and care for our babies. But even God-given instincts can turn sinful when we lose our focus. And I lost mine. In my Mama Bear mode, I was angry at anyone who seemed to be a threat to my “cubs'” well-being. And this wasn’t just a day or two, I am sorry to say. I was angry for months.
Then one day, God finally got my attention. He waited until I had just had enough. Because it wasn’t just my spiritual self suffering, I was suffering physically, with back and neck pain, exhaustion, all kinds of issues. And in my rock-bottom state, I heard His voice. Not audible, but still clear. And not earth-shattering. Just Truth. And that Truth was that I was worshipping my kids instead of worshipping Him. I was not trusting Him with my kids’ future. I assumed I knew better than He did what was right for them. I was no better than those men in long robes bowing down before a golden calf.
So I confessed. I let go of my plans and my assumptions and my fears. And I immediately felt better. My body felt better, my spirit felt lighter. God, in His grace, immediately restored to me the “joy of my salvation” that David talks about in the Psalms.
And when I got to that point, I was mad at myself for remaining in that idolatrous state for so long. God had this joy waiting for me, this peace, this freedom. And I rejected it so I could wallow in my sin. I missed out on so much for so long because I was face down in the mud of my self-focus, when I should have let God lift my head and pull me out.
Friends, learn my from my mistake. If you find yourself “convinced” of something, sure that you know what’s right, determined to ensure your way is followed — and angry and frustrated and miserable because it’s not — humble yourself before the Lord. Seek Him first. God has SO MUCH more for you than those feelings. God is FOR you. Don’t fight Him. Trust Him. Surrender to Him. Release the “gods” that you are worshipping and return to the one true God.
“But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.” Mt. 6:33
