We want to believe people are basically good. We want to believe that of others because we want to believe it of ourselves. We make “bad choices” or “stupid mistakes”, but we aren’t “bad people”.
Except that we are.
Hear me out…
That fact, when properly understood, can bring great freedom. It takes a lot of energy to believe we’re basically good. And we live in a constant state of disappointment when we think the same of others.
But friends, Jesus didn’t come to earth to save people who occasionally make stupid mistakes. He came to save sinners. And every single one of us is a sinner.
Every single one of us is also created by a God who loves us so deeply that He was willing to send His only son to this sin-filled earth to pay the penalty for our sin so that we can be forgiven and restored to a right relationship with Him. When we truly understand how amazing that grace is, we are free to truly love and be loved.
When I understand that we are all sinners, I’m not shocked when I see sin. Of course, that person lied. He’s a sinner. Of course that person gossiped. She’s a sinner. It’s not an excuse. It doesn’t make their behavior okay. But it does put that liar and gossiper in need of the same grace that this liar and gossiper needs. We are all made in the image of God, living in a fallen world. We are all in need of the same grace from the same loving God.
Understanding the depth of my sin helps me forgive others when they sin against me. If I think I am more righteous than “that guy”, I can’t forgive him. If I recognize he’s a sinner just like me, then I can forgive.
“But you don’t know what he’s done!!” You say. I know. You’re right. And I have been there. I fight against forgiveness constantly. It just “feels” right to hang on to it. But I am not punishing that person by remaining angry at him. I am punishing myself. I am trapped in that anger and I allow it to control me.
When I recognize that God has forgiven me for FAR more than anything anyone could do to me, then I can release the hold anger and unforgiveness has on me. I can pray for that person, knowing God loves him and wants him to be free of that sin, too, knowing others have felt about me the way I feel about him.
Forgiveness isn’t excusing behavior. It isn’t permitting wrong behavior to continue. You can confront sinful behavior and still forgive. You can walk away from someone and still forgive. You can put up boundaries and still forgive. You can recognize that you or someone you love has been deeply hurt and still forgive. Forgiveness isn’t about the other person. It’s about you. You can choose to forgive anyone of anything. Because all have sinned. And you can walk in the joy of knowing that you have been forgiven. Because you are part of the “all”.
We are all awful. And that makes God’s grace awesome. None of us deserves it. But all of us have it. It truly is amazing!
