MY BLOG POSTS

We might not all say it, but we ALL feel, at one time or another, some of us more often than others, that we are just not good enough.

We look at others and see so many who are smarter, prettier, richer. We see girls who seem to have it all together and we get discouraged because we are SO not together.

Just about everyone struggles with these feelings. Seriously. I can’t tell you how many girls I’ve talked to who are beautiful, stunning, yet look at themselves in the mirror and think they are the ugliest girl on the planet. Or girls who seem to breeze through even the toughest classes, but are wracked with worry every night before a big test. Sometimes the girls who seem to know everyone feel incredibly lonely and unloved.

Becoming a supermodel or a famous singer or a movie star doesn’t change it, either. Believe it or not, those folks have even more pressure than we do. Many of them struggle with insecurity to a degree that would shock most of us “normal folks.”

So here’s the deal: The problem isn’t that you’re not good enough. The problem is that you are believing a lie. That lie comes straight from the Father of Lies himself, and the way we battle with him is by using Truth – the Word of God.  Replace those lies with Truth every time they come into your mind. Every time.

Here are a few verses of Truth to start with. Memorize them. Write them on a post-it and stick it on your bathroom mirror, your bedroom wall. Fill your mind with  ”whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.” Phil. 4:8 Fill your mind so full of Truth that there is no room left for the lies.

Ps. 139:13-14 “For you created my inmost being;  you knit me together   in my mother’s womb. I praise you  because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful,  I know that full well.”

I John 3:1a “See what great love  the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God!”

Romans 8:17 “Now if we are children, then we are heirs —heirs of God and co-heirs with Christ, if indeed we share in his sufferings   in order that we may also share in his glory.”

Finding God’s will is a sometimes-overwhelming prospect. While we know a lot for sure, there are others areas that are gray. How do we navigate those areas?

This is in my mind right now because my oldest is wrestling through it. As a recent high school graduate, she has a lot of new, adult decisions to make: where to go to school, to church, what to study, who to date…She thought she had at least the first of those all figured out. She chose a college last fall, got scholarships, had her dorm and roommate all picked out and then…circumstances intervened and that fell through.

So what does a Jesus-follower do when we don’t know what God wants? When there’s no verse that says, “Go to _____ college,” “Study ___________”, “Marry _______”?

Pray. I know this sounds cliche. But prayer is powerful – when we pray, we are communicating to the Creator of the Universe! He knows everything, including where you should go to college, what you should study, and who you should marry. So talk to Him. And listen. God has given us the Holy Spirit to teach and guide us.

Seek Wise Counsel. The Proverbs tells us there is wisdom in counsel. So talk with your parents, your pastor, and other people in your life that you know have walked the Christ-life longer than you. What do they think about these decisions? What mistakes have they made that you could avoid? What wise choices have they made that you could emulate?

Study the Word. If what you want to do is opposed to what God clearly states, then it is not God’s will. God would never ask you to have sex outside of marriage. God would never ask you to be dishonest. God would never ask you to disrespect your parents. And, ladies, God would never want you to date someone who doesn’t share your faith. For the rest, seek biblical principles. For what to be: God has gifted you with talents and abilities. How can you use those in a career? For who to marry: Examine what men of God look like in the Bible and find someone who fits that model (be sure you’re striving to be a woman of God, too!).

Take a leap of faith. Sometimes, we do all that, and we’re still not 100% sure. That has been our family’s testimony on more than one occasion. In those times, we recall the advice my father-in-law gave us: “Just step out and trust God.” If you feel God directing you there, if those in your life agree with it, if the scripture doesn’t contradict it, then go! God rarely gives us the “whole story”. He shows us our story one page at a time. And some of those pages seem a little crazy. But as long as we are wholeheartedly seeking the Author and Finisher of our faith, we can be confident in Him.

I hate being uncomfortable. I hate tension. I hate change. I want everyone to be happy and healthy and for life to go smoothly. I want disagreements to be limited to chocolate vs. vanilla or tea vs. coffee (the correct answers being chocolate and coffee, of course!)

But..life isn’t like that. There is discomfort and tension and change. There is unhappiness and sickness and disagreements that rip people apart.

It’s not that some people enjoy the above-mentioned horrors. But some can manage them better. Unfortunately, I am not one of those people. My husband jokes that, in difficult times, I am like a snapping turtle – I either sink into my “shell” and avoid everyone, or I come out snapping off fingers and toes!

Lately, I have bounced between both locations, I am ashamed to say. And the fact is, I don’t feel any better in the shell or out snapping. Those responses don’t make situations better. They don’t solve problems (in reality, they make the problems worse!).

I have come to the realization that I have to learn to embrace the uncomfortable. That doesn’t mean enjoying tough situations.  But it does mean that I keep my head outside of my “shell” – with my mouth closed – and that I keep moving.

The only way through difficult times is to go through them. Like it or not, comfortable or not, no matter how tough it is. God has called me to follow Him. Sometimes, He leads me beside still waters and other times, through the valley of the shadow of death. But no matter what, He is with me. I will trust in Him.