Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Days

Last week wasn’t my best week. I was recovering from a virus that caused major congestion, fatigue, and falls into doorways resulting in stitches. Then, right when I started feeing better, I found out someone used my debit card info to spend hundreds of dollars at a casino. That same day, my husband’s computer crashed – 12 hours from the time he was supposed to defend his dissertation.

Ugh.

Some people throw themselves a good pity party when they’re having rotten weeks (like Alexander in the fabulous children’s book). But I tend to try and pretend it’s not that bad by comparing my problems to others who are dealing with worse. Like people battling horrible illnesses. Or people whose kids are battling horrible illnesses. Or friends whose spouses have left them. Or who are losing their homes because of financial troubles. Or folks dealing with chronic pain. Sure, my week was bad, but it all cleared up. My stitches are out, my cough is gone, my bank is working on recovering the stolen money, the IT guys at the seminary were able to recover Dave’s files. We ended this week just fine. Not like others whose troubles linger for months or years.

But, you know what? I didn’t deal with those troubles the way I should have. Why? Because I didn’t feel like it was right for me to complain about them. So I just acted like everything was fine. But it wasn’t! I HATE being sick, and I am vain enough to be bothered by the scar above my eyebrow. And a CASINO, really??!! Someone used MY name to gamble MY money? NOT okay!! And poor Dave – he spent MONTHS on that dissertation and, for a while, we thought all his research was gone. It was scary. Sure, it all ended up fine, but we didn’t know that while it was all going on.

I tried to pretend everything was fine and, in doing so, for a while, refused the help of concerned friends. And, worse, I neglected to cast my cares on the One who cares for me. I went all “Lone Ranger” because I didn’t feel my problems were worth burdening my friends or my God.

It was stupid, really. And incredibly prideful. I am not made to be a “Lone Ranger”. As Donne so eloquently stated, “No Man is an Island.” I wouldn’t want MY friends to have a bad week all by themselves. I would counsel teens to seek help from God when they are struggling. So I need to do what I would want others to do. I need to be honest when I’m having rough weeks – even though I, and those around me, know others are having worse weeks than me. But I don’t need to pretend it’s all good when it’s not.

And neither do you.

Learn from my foolish mistakes. If you’re having a bad day or week, tell a friend, pour your heart out to God. Lean on those around you. As I discovered, many people are there, waiting to help. All you have to do is ask!

2 Comments

  1. Susan Hutchison
    Jan 19, 2014

    Krista, there is one reference in the Bible that allowed me to realize that God cares about the smallest things going on in my life. He knows the number of hairs on my head! I don’t know about you, but I shed a lot of hair each day. The fact that he cares enough to know how many are on my head is mind boggeling. The little piece of information gave me the peace I needed to bring the most mundane problems to God’s feet. He good like that. :]

  2. Sue
    Jan 31, 2014

    We live in a culture that celebrates independence. We are so busy trying to prove to….(whoever is looking)…that ‘I’ve got this’ that we never teach our children how to ask for, receive or appreciate help. We cover, bury, and deny our shortcomings and extend and even increase our suffering rather than admit our need or ask for help. Our Father’s will is the exact opposite. He wants us to place our hopes, joys, heartache, and worries in His hands. He wants us to depend on Him… He also gave us a family of believers to support us in our journey. I don’t think it was a mistake that He uses the image of a body to describe our connection. There isn’t one part of the body that can thrive without complete dependence on the rest of the body. No matter if I am the lowly toe or the mighty heart I am depending on the muscles in the arms to bring food to the mouth, the digestive system to break down the food, a circulatory system that works with the respiratory system to ensure that every cell in the body gets the nutrition and oxygen it requires to live. Complete dependence….that is the picture He gave us. What is amazing is how in tune the body is to a part that is struggling. My eyes are weak so my ears have sharpened their sences (to the dismay of every student that thought a whisper wouldn’t be heard :). A healthy body communicates need and even has a system to battle invaders that intend to bring the body harm. What we have is a spiritual autoimmune problem. We have a history of the body attacking itself to the point that we have disconnected and forgotten the strength that comes through dependence.
    I love your blog. Your words are sincere and humble. Your willingness to share your highs and even weakest moments helps promote the healthy connection God intended. Thank you for the support and encouragement your words offer. Your self reflection often highlights your heart. Thank you for the gifts you give us when you share the lessons God is teaching you.

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