My Self Has Enough Help, Thank You

There are rows and rows…and rows and rows… of shelves housing books devoted to “self-esteem.” Most seem to focus on loving yourself, forgiving yourself, being good to yourself. Because we just don’t think enough of ourselves.


Here’s what I think: our problems with self-esteem aren’t that we don’t think enough of ourselves. Our problem is that we think of ourselves WAY too much.

At least I do, anyway. I don’t think a day goes by when I don’t think about myself, my needs, my wants. When I don’t feel frustrated that I am not being treated well enough. But plenty of days go by when I don’t think about others: the needs of others, the wants of others, whether or not I am treating others well enough.

But imagine how much happier I would be if I did think about others more. Being all “woe is me” brings misery. It is exhausting to think about myself so much! But thinking about how I can help others brings me joy.

So if I really want to make ME happy, I should think about ME less.

Because my self has enough help.


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